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  1. #1
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    Default My Good bye Letter

    Addiction,
    You had always been a casual friend to me.More like an aquintance.
    I enjoyed you when you were around,but didn't miss you when you were not.

    Then... For many reasons,I began to rely on you more.You became a good friend,a friend that was there to console me,to feel good about life and myself. You never doubted me,but it came to the point where I as doubting myself.

    The people closest to me were seeing a difference.There were a lot of questions and on my part a lot of lies.I was becoming someone they didn't like.Someone I didn't like.But...you were still there.

    My relationships were crumbling around me.My family was always on guard.I have so much good in my life but I chose you over everything that is good.I have had so much shame and guilt.How could I do this? This is not me,how did I get to this place?

    I let you in when I was most vulnerable and you took advantage.I am angry at this!

    I will not feel the shame and guilt anymore.I can't if I want to move forward,and I DO.

    Ive learned so much about myself and how I let you influence me.I have dug deep and am so proud of myself.My family sees it! I see it too!
    I am learning the tools to cope.I am making my own rules.I am in charge of my future.Me and only Me.Not you.
    There will be times when you try to creep back in but I will dig deep and always remember what brought me to this place.You will Not bring me down again.

    I have no more secrets and I have great supports.Supports I didn't know I had.Thats a beautiful thing!!

    So addiction,I say good bye.I have a lot to live for and you are not part of it.
    So excited about my future,No more lies.
    Peg

    I wrote this letter a couple of weeks into my recovery.
    That was 2 years ago!Ive been a non drinker since December 18,2013.

    Life is good! I am good!
    Peg

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
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    2,634

    Default

    Thanks for sharing this with us, it is a story that can be written by many or us at SMART.
    In memory of HG “What people really need is a good listening to” " Mary Lou Casey", http://bit.ly/passthehat

  3. #3
    Sam29's Avatar
    Sam29 is offline Distance Training Team
    Former SMART Online Facilitator
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    California
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    Default

    Very inspiring, Peg. Thank you.

    Love,
    Sam

  4. #4
    HughK's Avatar
    HughK is offline SMART Online Facilitator
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    Default

    Good on you Peg! Fantastic! Congrats on the two years
    What got me sober was trying to get sober. Every time I lapsed, picked up, drank, I was thoroughly beaten. I thought at those times "there is no hope for me" Yet, when I had recovered from those thoughts just a little, I thought "have another go!" It was a lot of little sparks, rather than a flame, that got me here.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
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    smack dab where Time begins
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    Default

    Nice to see your post this morning Peg
    Wherever you go, there you are

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
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    Midwest
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    Default

    Thank you for sharing that. I really needed to read that today .

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
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    Canada
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    Default

    Good morning,
    Not sure how the "Not You" got in the title line,anywho...
    Thank you for your responses,I truly appreciate each and every one!
    Peg

  8. #8

    Default

    Congratulations.

  9. #9

    Default

    Awesome Peg, Very inspiring. I congratulate you for your continued VICTORY!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Upstate NY
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    Default

    Well written and inspiring letter. Kudos!
    “It’s not how far you fall, but how high you bounce that counts.” - Zig Ziglar

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
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    United States of America
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    Default

    WOW! Some pretty heavy stuff there. This was so inspiring and I appreciate you sharing this! It's awesome to hear of other people's success stories. To see this written in the form of a goodbye letter is... almost eerie. It's like saying goodbye to an old friend or old lover that treated you like dirt. Very intense! Thank you.

  12. #12

    Default

    Really, really lovely.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Location
    Chicago
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    Default

    Love this Peg, so much that I printed it out and put it in a special place to remind myself. Thank you so much for posting it!

  14. #14

    Default

    This is good stuff indeed! And congrats!

  15. #15

    Default

    Beautiful... I share the same sentiment!

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
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    Canada
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    Default

    Thanks to you all,
    This is my life and I'm loving it.
    Easy? No but I'm looking forward and on a great path,and soooo worth it!
    Peg

  17. #17

    Default

    This is wonderful Peg, thanks so much for writing it. For me, closing out day three, it will really help me see my addiction for what it is. A manipulative hanger-on pretending to be a friend.

    Congrats on two years! Thanks for the inspiration.

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Nov 2015
    Location
    Shropshire, England
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    Default

    That was an amazing and inspiring post... i am taking alot from it in my recovery also
    James81

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
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    Canada
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    Default

    Thank you for the replies.
    Your words mean a lot to me.
    Peg

  20. #20

    Default

    Wow Peg....very thoughtful and inspiring...I like that "good bye"....6 days for me!! hope to be where you are in 2 years!!

  21. #21

    Default

    Congrats! That's awesome!!! As a newbie here, reading something like that keeps me hopeful anD inspires me to continue on my path of sobriety. Thank You!

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
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    MA
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    Default

    Great letter Peg. Thank you for sharing.

  23. #23

    Default

    pretty awesome stuff peg, thank you!

  24. #24

    Default

    Simply Awesome!!!! You're an inspiration and this should be a sticky..

  25. #25

    Default

    Great letter!

  26. #26
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
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    Canada
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    Default

    Thank you everyone! I appreciate your words
    Life is good,I am good!
    Peg

  27. #27
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
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    1,435

    Default

    Dear Peg
    Thank you for sharing this inspiring goodbye letter. And it really resonates with me, how our addiction can become our best friend at such a high price. Even after quite a few years clean and sober, I have moments of doubt, I find myself sometimes longing for that old "friend" but then I remember just what kind of a friend it really was and I continue on my journey of sobriety. And you're right when you say that it's not always easy, this new path, no it isn't but so worth it. Thank you for giving me something wonderful to wake up to today.

    Best to you.
    q7
    "The central human drama is not wanting the experience we are having"

  28. #28
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Location
    Saint-Petersburg, Russia
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    383

    Default

    That was quite inspiring and thought-provoking) Thinking of my addiction as a friend who used me all up and had just thrown away when things got the worst, and inviting me to have the same experience over and over again - there was and has been nothing friendly in it to me.

  29. #29
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Maryland
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    Default

    Very inspiring! Congrats on the 2 years, as well! Were you using SMART when you wrote this letter?

  30. #30
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
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    Canada
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    Default

    Thank you Junior,
    I was in a 6 week in patient treatment facility when I wrote my letter.
    It was an AA based facility but after a few weeks there I was given the opportunity to go to 2 Smart meetings.
    That was a gift. I finished my treatment in early February 2014 and when I got home I Joined SROL and began attending F2F meetings weekly.
    I still attend the meetings and read here. I do this because I have got so much from Smart that maybe I can tell my story and give someone hope. Hope that I was looking for in the beginning of my recovery.

    I don't drink and I have to thank Smart and my supports for helping me find my way.
    Thanks for asking...All my best to you
    Peg

  31. #31

    Default

    Great job staying focused.stay determined, you know what you need to do

  32. #32

    Default

    Great job staying focused.
    Very inspiring! Congrats on the 2 years, as well! Were you using SMART when you wrote this letter?
    That was quite inspiring and thought-provoking.
    Last edited by HughK; May 18, 2016 at 6:48 AM. Reason: First sentence removed.

  33. #33

    Default

    That is awesome. You give me hope and inspiration. I wrote my good-bye letter as well. I am currently in a live-in treatment facility and am leaving this Friday. I have my tools and surly plan to use them. Today is my 44th day sober. Am so excited to live again instead of just exist. Thanks

  34. #34

    Default

    Thank you for sharing, it has given me great inspiration.

  35. #35

    Default

    Hello !!
    Thank you for sharing this letter, I am glad that you have been able to be sober for this two years and I'm sure you will be able to do it for so much more years !!
    Yes life is good

  36. #36

    Default

    Congratulations on your sobriety and your inspiring letter. I said good bye to my old friend 2 1/2 months ago and started with Smart today. I'm enjoying my life, and myself, so much more now. Life is very good.

  37. #37
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    East Stroudsburg Pennsylvania USA
    Posts
    957

    Default Slow and Steady Wins the Race


    Hello lin1321,


    Saying god bye to your old "friend" is perhaps the most life enhancing powerful decision you have made in your life. It is guaranteed to open a new world to you it has for me 2 1/2 months is an awesome beginning. I am pleased you are experiencing life as very good!

  38. #38
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    1,296

    Default

    Hey lin1321,
    Thanks for your kind words! I started with Smart around the 2 1/2 month mark also.Congrats to you!!!
    I am coming up on 4 years in December,I can't say enough about the website and the people in these forums.
    This is the best thing I've ever done for me,and it will be for you too!!
    All my best
    Peg

  39. #39
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    24,229

    Default

    Wonderful letter Peg.

    JvB
    "Life, as the Buddha said twenty-four hundred years ago, isn't but includes suffering (Life isn't suffering. But it includes suffering.) See it as it is, accept the good with the bad, and thereby enjoy much of it."
    Albert Ellis, Ph.D.

  40. #40
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    Location
    California
    Posts
    3

    Default

    I know you wrote this a while ago, but thanks so much for doing it! I am new to SR but sober for 6+ months, is there a forum you would suggest?
    Thanks

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