Cravings & Urges to Use: The "Beast" was defeated last night!

[jakjak]

For the first time in a long time, I had a strong urge to get drunk last night.

It was a familiar situation - after work, driving home, to be alone to an empty apartment, pissed off, and, most important of all, HUNGRY.

On the drive home, I seriously considered stopping at a liquor store for a 12 pack of 6% beer. My “addictive voice” reminded me that I didn’t have to work the next day.

I was pissed off all day long because my employer freaked out on me without knowing all the facts. I was reprimanded because she was jumping to conclusions. I was so angry, that I hardly ate anything all day long. Just a couple of handfuls of sunflower seeds. So not only was I hungry, I was also ANGRY.

Going home to an empty apartment, I knew that I’d be LONELY.

Topping it all off, I was TIRED from working three consecutive days. For two of these three days, my shifts were over twelve hours long!

How did I handle this craving?

The most important thing I did to deal with this urge to get drunk was to get a meal.

I went to Subway and had a footlong Meatball Marinara. After that, I went to the grocery store and picked up a deli sandwich and cooked BBQ chicken half, in case the sub wasn’t enough. When I came home from eating, I didn’t do much of anything. I just kinda relaxed.

While I was at the grocery store, my systolic blood pressure was over 150! That’s much higher than normal!

I should be very proud of how this craving was handled. I remember telling myself “drinking is not the answer,” “going back to my old life in not an option,” and “I’m just hungry, more than anything else, I need to eat and relax for awhile.” I can also recall thinking “drinking will not make things better.” “This is a situation I’ve dealt with before.” (in my past efforts to get and stay sober) “I don’t want to throw away what I’ve accomplished over the last two months.”

I’ve been sober since 10/22/13 and this is the first really serious challenge I’ve had in staying sober. IMHO, dealing with these episodic cravings is the key challenge in staying sober.

[luckylaura84]

very nice story thank u for sharing! Congratulations too!!

[fenquat]

" I remember telling myself “drinking is not the answer,” “going back to my old life in not an option,” and “I’m just hungry, more than anything else, I need to eat and relax for awhile.” I can also recall thinking “drinking will not make things better.” “This is a situation I’ve dealt with before.” (in my past efforts to get and stay sober) “I don’t want to throw away what I’ve accomplished over the last two months.”"

All truthful statements and as the saying goes 'the truth will set you free'.

Nicely done

laura, nice to have you here with us and very cool to see your first post is a positive one to another's success.

[85MonteSS]

I often forget that thirst and hunger can also lead to making those cravings worse.....a lot of the times I am thirsty and the addict in me thinks I need alcohol....sometimes just a big glass of water helps......hunger is the same for me...eating helps them pass as well.

[jakjak]

IMHO, hunger is a huge trigger for drinking that doesn't get nearly enough attention in the recovery community.

For many years, I had the same item on the dinner menu - a 12 pack of beer.

After consuming so many carbohydrates in the form of beer every night, I wouldn't eat much throughout the workday.

By quitting time at work, I was always ravenous and more than ready for my liquid "meal."

A big part of staying sober, for me at least, is eating enough throughout the day, at regular intervals, so that I never get overly hungry.

[shelly808]

Thats great!

[lillydee]

Waking up is a trigger but am still grateful alot of junkies. Didnt make it through the night ..

[Kara_RN]

Awesome! I too overcame a very strong and frightening urge recently (I have my story written up but want to wait to post it until I graduate from my monitoring program) and used some of the same strategies you mentioned. I won't do this, I'm not going to throw all this work down the drain, I can get through this, etc. It is absolutely frightening how seductive that voice can be. But after getting through that scenario and succeeding at ignoring my urges, the next time the same opportunity popped up it was INCREDIBLY easier to get through.

[Tramp]

The urges do stop eventually. I believe it's mostly habit. And habits are hard to break. Hard but not impossible. I know, I've been there, done that. I recently passed the four year mark. I made it and so will you.

[positivemuse]

thank you for this positive story and congrats

[gettingbetterfl]

Thanks for the story. Treating yourself to a good meal meant that you took care of yourself. Sometimes I will order some Chinese food and watch a movie on cable instead of giving in to urges... and it works! The urges disappear... and I wake up the next day feeling good about myself for my choice.

All the best to you in your journey

[jakjak]

Thanks to everyone who replied or read my earlier post, I particularly thank everyone for the words of encouragement.

I agree that it's mostly habit - the power of habit is a huge deal. Learning to live without alcohol is about learning new habits, such as developing the habit of doing a quick CBA in your head when the craving or urge to use strikes, seemingly out of the clear blue sky.

In my experience, the most challenging aspect of staying sober is the intermittent, episodic, "once in a great while" nature of the cravings and urges to use.

I'll go days, weeks, and months without experiencing a serious challenge/urge to use, and, then all of the sudden one day... it hits me like a ton of bricks - the “beast” ambushes me in a surprise attack after a long period of dormancy.

I've been sober since 10/22/13, and, as it stands now, the incident that precipitated my original post on SMART two weeks ago is the only serious challenge to my sobriety thus far.

This includes going to dinner with friends who were drinking with their meal in a licensed establishment the other night - I wasn’t even slightly tempted to order a drink(s). I ordered a large, high carb meal, in a pre-emptive strike against any craving/urge to use that might have resulted from the high risk situation of being in a licensed establishment with friends who were drinking.

I know that someday, another craving or urge to use will challenge my sobriety once again. The beast will ambush once again. It's key to be prepared for that next beast attack, because you have no idea how many days, weeks, or months away it might be. The “once in a great while” nature of the beast attacks is what concerns me more than anything.

[jakjak]

Thanks for the story. Treating yourself to a good meal meant that you took care of yourself. Sometimes I will order some Chinese food and watch a movie on cable instead of giving in to urges... and it works! The urges disappear... and I wake up the next day feeling good about myself for my choice.

All the best to you in your journey

+1000 gettingbetterfl - Chinese food, while not the healthiest choice in the world, is still a far better source of carbohydrate than beer, wine, or hard liquor. Any carbohydrate "cures the craving." Feeling good about your choices = sobiety is it's own reward.

- - - Updated - - -

Awesome! I too overcame a very strong and frightening urge recently (I have my story written up but want to wait to post it until I graduate from my monitoring program) and used some of the same strategies you mentioned. I won't do this, I'm not going to throw all this work down the drain, I can get through this, etc. It is absolutely frightening how seductive that voice can be. But after getting through that scenario and succeeding at ignoring my urges, the next time the same opportunity popped up it was INCREDIBLY easier to get through.

Kara, look forward to seeing your story on here!

[gila_monster]

I too find eating enough food to be really full helps curb urges. It also helps me to eat the meal by the 5 o'clock hour. I think eating a little bit of sweets later helps as well. And immersing myself in something distracting too.

[jhaze716]

i hear that.iv lost a few friends .one was actually prescribed methadone and k-pins n took to much n never woke up.but definetly blessed to be hear.there have been times i didnt want to be.but once time goes on things get easier

[jhaze716]

this site is so much better for me.im on suboxone and hate outpatient and na.but this gives me ppl to talk to and is actually recognised as a program in compliance with my doc so im happy to have found this

[imafriend]

really so happy for you. congradulations. i hope you keep up the wonderful work.