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Leslie
HB – 43, Fresno, CA
Member,
Message Board Liaison and Online Meeting Facilitator-in-Training,
SMART Recovery® Online
Former maladaptive behavior: alcohol
Sober: 5 months (one slip) and counting
I
came to SMART Recovery® in January of 2007. I had become
physically addicted to alcohol and could not get through more than
three or four hours without starting to experience withdrawal
symptoms, including elevated heart rate, excessive perspiration, and
uncontrollable shaking.
I had been working on giving alcohol
up for a few years before finding SMART Recovery® and underwent
my first detoxification at home without any medical or social
support, with the exception of my partner. The process of leaving an
addiction can be a bumpy one, and I was on and off of alcohol a few
times prior to January. Since I was struggling, I started looking at
Alcoholics Anonymous for possible support, but I read some of The
Big Book and knew it was not for me. I would have left a meeting
in disgust because their beliefs are so far outside of my own
experiences. I did not know there were secular options available.
I
started searching on the Internet and found out about SMART Recovery®
on http://www.about.com.
I spent some time in the chat room and attended a meeting, and the
approach really made sense to me. I detoxified at home again and
managed to remain sober for about 45 days. I had a relapse in
Feb/March but have been without alcohol for two additional months,
and I’m returning to school in June to earn my Drug and Alcohol
Counseling Certificate so I can go to work helping others get free of
their chemical burdens.
SMART Recovery® offers a way to
examine our beliefs and our self-talk, to learn to think rationally
about our drinking and drug use. It is held together by a network of
human beings that have learned the methods and seek to assist others
in implementing them. It is an online community, but it is a true,
vibrant community in which everyone acts, in one way or another, in
support of others. I have even been open about my sexual
orientation, as I am a lesbian, and have never been made to feel
uncomfortable or unwelcome because of it. Acceptance of others is
a key component of SMART Recovery®. These individuals have
become some of my closest friends.
I can’t tell you if I
would have succeeded without SMART Recovery®, but I do know that
shared experiences and know-how have gone a long way as far as giving
me confidence that I could break the addiction and reclaim my life. I
feel free of alcohol’s grip at last. I have become a volunteer
myself, and I’m in training to become a meeting facilitator, so
my experience with SMART Recovery® has not only helped me quit
using alcohol, it has also helped me shape my future.
LeslieHB,
age 43
Fresno, CA
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